Deeenie

Yesterday one of my autistic kids finally learned my name, but he calls me "Deenie" instead of Darlene. It's so cute, I could explode. He has apraxia of speech (a disorder of muscle incoordination) so everything he says sounds a little off and jargon-like. It actually makes him 10x cuter. I especially love when he says "no inky" (for "no thank you"). God I'm gonna miss that kid. I'm going to miss all those kiddos. Again I got so attached to my clients & it is a sucky (in lack of a better word) realization that I have to leave them, but I wish the best for all of them nonetheless.

I can still remember my first client in undergrad. I wonder how he's doing. I wonder if he is a pro at saying his "r" sound now; I bet he is. From time to time I think about the client I had at PanAm. I wonder what he's upto now, 2 years later. Is he verbal now? Is he communicating with others more appropriately? And my elderly client with anomic aphasia, who had a genius IQ pre-stroke & was always so grumpy coming to therapy.. how's he doing? I can still recall how he gave me a huge hug and a kiss on the forehead at our last session together & it almost brought me to tears. I just wish I could somehow get an update on those that I've worked with in the past.

I'm going to come across many people in my life, and it's just so painstakingly hard to not care for them & grow attached. Hopefully one day I will learn how to inhibit all these emotions that I feel when I have to leave them or when they have to leave me. It's gonna be a toughie.

Anyway. Still searching for that perfect job..