This is me, now.

I found myself rummaging through Livejournal and Xanga, reading my old blogs over again. Looking back has helped me internalize the fact that my adolescence was a mess -- a big boring mess. I was pretty awkward until my senior year of highschool, at which I was still semi-awkward. lol. Terrible. Often times I hyped up little events that happened, to make my readers think that my life was 10x more exciting than it actually was. I was stupid.. but I was a teenager. And I think those two words are generally synonymous.

Honestly, if I could redo it all, I would. I've always aspired to be someone that lives life without regrets, but I think those kind of lucky people are certainly few and far between. It's interesting to see how much you've changed (whether it be for the better or worse) over the years. For that reason, I really do feel like people should blog or keep a journal or any form of memorabilia, so that they can reflect back on the road that led them to where they are now. Although, I'm almost embarrassed by who I used to be and I can't necessarily say it directly lead me to the person I am today. Maybe it did in some vague obscure way.

Noticeable improvements I've made over the past 5-7 years:
- I don't talk about trivial matters as frequently.
- I actually make good grades. I was prettty dumb those 1st 2 yrs of college.
- My standards have been raised when it comes to friendships/relationships.
- I don't talk ghetto slang anymore.
- My vocabulary has expanded beyond that of a 5th grader.
- I'm more sensitive to others' perspectives.
- I write to express, not impress.
- I'm not as fat as before (lol why didn't anyone ever tell me I was a damn cow).

It goes without say that I'm most definitely not the same person who posted those entries in 2003, 2004, or 2005.. I can't even say I'm the same person I was in 2008. I'm constantly maturing, and I think it's important to tune into the fact that no one stays the same. Some people do unfortunately go the adverse direction & take step backwards instead of making progress for themselves. I'm not one of those people. Learn from your mistakes. Not only that, but learn from others' as well. Can I get an Amen.